| I feel like a spare tyre |
[Aug. 21st, 2010|10:20 am] |
I just finished speaking to my mother and she's damn serious about me getting married at 20.Her reason was acceptable so I accepted it. So I was bathing and I did some calculations (I can’t believe I have to calculate my life..) . Four years down now, I’ll be 20. It’s uni and no where else ofcourse. If I get married at 20 then I will enjoy 5 years of marriage before having children after 25. I am NOT going around my University campus with a bulging stomach and sit for tests and lectures while having morning sickness. NO NO NO WAY.
Yesterday after night study I was on the bus and I found the reason to why I don’t want to keep those happy memories from last year. It’s because I’m going through the same this year and if I do then I will keep wishing that someone, just anyone would do the same for me which doesn’t seem to be the case.
It's a weird cliche, I know. But well, the reason just popped up in my head. |
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[Aug. 10th, 2010|10:19 am] |
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My Abang Nafi (who drew my school's logo) says I look petite for my age. HAHA |
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[Aug. 10th, 2010|09:15 am] |
After I posted that previous post I went to hang the clothes and wash my shoe. I heart the weather today. Life has been upsetting for me recently. Disappointments anger sadness stress confusion complications but life can be paradoxical sometimes.
"Life can't always be about rainbows and sunshines but we must always find a reason to be happy"
And he's right. I feel like a fat man. Who just got beaten up badly in the face but still smiling. At times I dont really know what to feel because now I have to face the people I once thought I could prove wrong. See, I thought it was alright to show to others that their perception can be wrong. I did things to save the pride of the person I love. In all attempts to prove these people wrong, I got hurt, but worse, I ended up proving them right instead but in Literature we learnt that, "If you're being licked before you begin and you begin anyway and you see your way through no matter what." Thats bravery and so, the people who were right about things would now see that I was being brave.
We humans have to admit we lie alot to save ourselves. Sometimes we speak in lies to cover up the truths and what we really feel. Other times we speak half truths so as not to make ourselves look bad. Everyone wants to live easy. No one wants to make a sacrifice. Its sad to know that the one person you thought will keep his/her word, didnt. Its not disappointing. Just sad.
Maybe the postion for my first love has been ripped off but the position for my first true love hasn't.
This is to girls who are desperate and like a guy who's attached. Please don't make yourselves look so cheap. Your time will come, so dont destroy another girl's happiness for your own. Maybe she'll let you have it but she might not be happy. Two words. Have mercy.
I'm actually still angry but I know this boiling anger will fade with time. Sorry 4/6, for the most cheerful girl in class just had to cry and let everyone watch her be pathetic. Thank you, lovely people for making me strong again.
I think one day we're all going to pass the stage of being a hedonist and trying to outdo each other. |
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[Aug. 10th, 2010|07:58 am] |
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GOOD MORNING FELLOW EARTHLINGS! |
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[Aug. 8th, 2010|09:10 pm] |
A predicament to break lose.
All boys and girls.
And myself. Sigh. |
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[Aug. 8th, 2010|02:17 pm] |
I just realised 2 weeks ago two things I love left me. (The other is my Vivaz) Haha.
I wish this fever would leave me alone. I wanna lie down. buhbye. |
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[Aug. 1st, 2010|02:38 pm] |
I really wish everything in the world was easier done than said.
I wish you still cared about me so atleast I wouldnt have to go through this alone. |
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[Jul. 31st, 2010|11:20 pm] |
Sigh, I miss you ya know? Quite terribly actually.
You left me when I needed you most. Sigh.
I didn't stand in your way
But I miss you more than I
Missed you before and now
Where I'll find comfort, God knows
'Cause you left me
Just when I needed you most
(Left me, just when I needed you most) |
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[Jul. 30th, 2010|03:32 pm] |
EVERYONE. JUMP OUT OF FB AND GO TO TWITTER. Haha
Believe me one day soon Facebook will turn into the Friendster today. |
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| Run devil run |
[Jul. 30th, 2010|02:33 pm] |
I seem to dislike Friday afternoons already. On the way home I will always encounter things like, "Eh eh! Adik dynn!" Or "You like purple?" Hahahaha basket cheeeeee.
I now have time to hang online and update my Lj. Why? Because I'm constantly getting good grades. Like for e.g. *drum rolls* 23/25 for Phys and 12/13 for Globalisation essay. Haha. Like Ziq would say uh, "Yang kau blajar asal? Nanti jadi lebih pandai." But no, I'm not THAT hidung tinggi.
SS prep was fantabulobulous! I slept at 8 last night so i woke up around 2 am. and did some memorizing. I will not talk about my studies anymore because I dont want to become like...............shrek. |
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